I should clarify: I re-read my post and realized that I painted her much more the anti-advocate then she is. Recently and for the near future I'm doing a lot of traveling for work. When I'm away from the house she requests that "her" handgun be left loaded, on safety, in the safe should there be any problems. She is competent with a handgun and is comfortable with normal operation as well as safety-aware. I'm not sure if she is so anti-rifle on account of the slippery-slope that gun addiction is or if she has some misconception about rifles being a hell of a lot more dangerous than handguns. Realistically, a round could make it through a wall and into a neighbors house marginally more easily but I'm not going to think about whether Bobby and Betsy are safe through 3+ walls and over 400ft when there's an assailant in my hallway. But I digress. She is not completely anti-gun, she is anti-more-guns and much less fond of CC even then she used to be.
I like the "Family Heirloom" concept but it is inapplicable. Each time I try to open the discussion to get a good handle on her fears and concerns I get shutdown immediately with "I just don't like it. I don't. It's not happening."
At the end of the day my drive to guarantee my family's protection and safety is going to outweigh uninformed or inappropriate fears...but I'd sure like this situation to develop smoothly.
I have heard that a 5.56 will penetrate less interior drywall than a 9mm...its so fast and so light that it destroys itself and dissipates the energy quicker than a slower moving heavier projectile....nothing works better in your favor than facts...but dont take my word for it, look it up! im just too lazy and your wife isnt my problem right now. but id be interested in your search results