How to handle a 'creeper' without getting in trouble?

[Caleb]

Get her some Pepper spray and maybe even some "Inert" ones to practice so she can learn how it works with the wind and such.

I would do this

 

[45calibre]

What happened to kickin some azz. 1-2 years probation and 500 for bail. Prolly not the right idea but it will get the point across. Have him sit next to yourself and the father, and you guys can have a little talk with the perv.

what if he carries?

 

[sloughfoot]

It is called "stalking". It is described in the Indiana Statutes. Your PD is wrong if they think they can't do anything about it.

If you don't get help from your PD, contact your prosecutor's Office, the County Sheriff, and the Indiana State Police. Don't stop until you get the help that your niece needs.

Sure, maybe you can run him off but what about the next daughter....

 

[Dirtebiker]

Sorry, but I think the majority here are getting way ahead of the situation. I'm not saying not to be cautious, but the guy could just be a lonely widower looking for conversation.... And yes, he could also be a real freak! With the limited info. we have, there's no way of knowing.
I'm a father of two beautiful girls, and would defend them to my death! I salute you for your concern for your niece! I'm just saying, get more info. before jumping on the guy with all kinds of accusations and threats!
No harm in hanging out, getting license plate number, and any other info you can. Maybe get seated close by so you can hear the conversation for yourself, then you can better determine if he's up to no good!
IF you decide he's a creep, then great, do what everyone has suggested! Until then, do some investigating, spend some time at the restaurant, check him out.
Maybe strike up a conversation next time he comes in. I don't know about you, but I think I'm a good judge of character. I'm pretty sure I could determine pretty quick whether he's a decent guy or if he's a pervert! Even if you don't figure him out, at least you get an idea who your dealing with.
Don't take me wrong, if the guy deserves a beat down, then go for it! But if he's just a lonely old guy, just being friendly, then let him be!
Good luck, and I hope you get the whole situation figured out soon!

 

[Benny]

It is called "stalking". It is described in the Indiana Statutes. Your PD is wrong if they think they can't do anything about it.

If you don't get help from your PD, contact your prosecutor's Office, the County Sheriff, and the Indiana State Police. Don't stop until you get the help that your daughter needs.

Sure, maybe you can run him off but what about the next daughter....

I can't reiterate enough that this guy seems very creepy and precautionary measures should certainly be taken, but can going into a restaurant and talking to the hostess be considered "stalking" if there is no proof he is following her around outside of the restaurant?

 

[sloughfoot]

That is precisely why an investigation needs to be made. To determine exactly what is going on. I have done these investigations myself in a previous life.

The stalking law was created because of situations like this. The folks we pay to enforce the laws should be looking into this situation.

To answer your specific question,....Yes. When you walk into an obsessed person's room and see what he has on his walls....Yes.

An obsessed person can convince himself over time that his "love" is his and she belongs to him and that she shares his feelings.

 

[TiminMishawaka]

There is no confusion here. This is stalking. Time to tell the authorities.

 

[10-32]

I think the critical term here is "impermissible contact."

At present, this guy is patronizing a business open to the public and showing inordinate interest in a young woman. Legally, there's nothing for a LEO to hang his hat on, even when the purpose of the man's interest is obvious.

But once this character has been NOTIFIED that his conduct is causing the aforementioned "emotional distress," a LEO has something to work with.

That's why someone needs to confront this guy (in a calm, non-hostile way) and the conversation needs to be witnessed.

What about the part of the diffinition that says "includes but is not limited to repeated or continuing impermissible contact"? His behavior is repeated contact. If the guy is going there and then leaving when the girl isn't working, patronizing the business isn't his true intentions.

 

[10-32]

He is middle eastern, possibly Indian,

Any chance I can get a copy of this guy's picture if you get it. My daughter has a friend that works as a cashier at Menards in Avon and she had a similar problem with a Indian/Turkish guy there. I'm wondering if it's the same guy. Their staff was right on it and had a trespass notice issued to the guy.

The main reason I ask is because if this is the same guy, it helps to establish a pattern of contuct should charges be brought against him.

 

[Mackey]

I cannot post how I would handle this.

 

[Caleb]

If she is able, get an no-contact order

 

[Liberty Sanders]

What about the part of the diffinition that says "includes but is not limited to repeated or continuing impermissible contact"? His behavior is repeated contact. If the guy is going there and then leaving when the girl isn't working, patronizing the business isn't his true intentions.

IMPERMISSIBLE contact....if you go into a public business fifty times a day it's not "impermissible."

It will BECOME impermissible after he's warned by the owner.

 

[Concerned Citizen]

So the owner of this business is officially a dirt-bag, in my opinion. My niece did not work on Wednesday, but when she went back in, she asked the owner if the creeper showed up on Wednesday, & he said Yes. She asked if he told the guy not to come back, and he got defensive with her. He said "He hasn't actualy done anything ileagal, so I cant tell him not to come back, besides, if I do he might retaliate and do something bad, or he might sue me".

Of course all of us know this isn't the case. This creeper comes in almost every week & spends $45, and that's all he really cares about. His big solution was to take her off Wednesdays. This place is Sushi Express in Avon, behind the Arby's. This guy also owns Tegry Bistro in Brownsburg. Never again will this loser get my business, & he will forever get a bad review when anyone brings up either one of his restaurants.

 

[actaeon277]

Sheep do not like confrontation. He will (like most sheep) ignore a problem. Then after something happens, he will cry. "Why didn't someone do something?"

I'm talking about restaurant owner, so there's no mix up.

 

[INMIline]

Is she going to quit? Or are you going to wait and see if the guy switches days right along with her?

 

[El Guero]

she should talk to her manager and make him aware of the situation,so he can re assign her when the guy come over, also she can have some witness to back up in case the police need to be called in, if the guy insist to come over and bother they can get the police to advice him not to come over any more. but i don't think you should get involved with the guy, the responsibility is of the manager to protect the employees.

 

[BumpShadow]

So the owner of this business is officially a dirt-bag, in my opinion. My niece did not work on Wednesday, but when she went back in, she asked the owner if the creeper showed up on Wednesday, & he said Yes. She asked if he told the guy not to come back, and he got defensive with her. He said "He hasn't actualy done anything ileagal, so I cant tell him not to come back, besides, if I do he might retaliate and do something bad, or he might sue me".

Of course all of us know this isn't the case. This creeper comes in almost every week & spends $45, and that's all he really cares about. His big solution was to take her off Wednesdays. This place is Sushi Express in Avon, behind the Arby's. This guy also owns Tegry Bistro in Brownsburg. Never again will this loser get my business, & he will forever get a bad review when anyone brings up either one of his restaurants.

So wait, the guy's a dirtbag for wanting people to spend money at his business?

Don't get me wrong, I am sympathetic for the girl in all this, but she is gonna have to learn to deal with it. From the owners point of view its either a easily replaced 15 year old greeter that costs him money or a regular customer who gives him money. As "creepy" as this guy might be, she should be grateful he comes in because of her and basically pays for her shift. Working for a living is not all about dodging work and chatting with friends, its about going in every time and justifying your continued employment.

Unwanted advances are never fun, but they are a fact of life for most women, and even men. Deal.

 

[Benny]

^^^LMAO at the "grateful" comment.

she should talk to her manager and make him aware of the situation,so he can re assign her when the guy come over, also she can have some witness to back up in case the police need to be called in, if the guy insist to come over and bother they can get the police to advice him not to come over any more. but i don't think you should get involved with the guy, the responsibility is of the manager to protect the employees.

Welcome to post #6.

 

[concrete dog]

Is she going to quit? Or are you going to wait and see if the guy switches days right along with her?

 

[Concerned Citizen]

So wait, the guy's a dirtbag for wanting people to spend money at his business?

Don't get me wrong, I am sympathetic for the girl in all this, but she is gonna have to learn to deal with it. From the owners point of view its either a easily replaced 15 year old greeter that costs him money or a regular customer who gives him money. As "creepy" as this guy might be, she should be grateful he comes in because of her and basically pays for her shift. Working for a living is not all about dodging work and chatting with friends, its about going in every time and justifying your continued employment.

Unwanted advances are never fun, but they are a fact of life for most women, and even men. Deal.

The guy is a dirtbag for telling me to my face that "Yes, the customers behavior was innapropriate, and yes, he would ban him next time he came in", and then getting defensive with her after he refused to do what he said.

You can go ahead & stick your head in the sand, but when it comes to my family, I'm not going to.