How to handle a 'creeper' without getting in trouble?

[Osobuco]

200 years ago? Shoot him in the back with your long rifle as he is leaving, take his scalp and hang it on your cabin door.

100 years ago? Grab him by the collar, drag him outside and put the barrel of your triple-lock Smith in his mouth until he gags and then pistol whip him.

Now? Exactly what Mr. Jarrel said. God that hurts. The second time in one month I have agreed with Anarchist Butters.

So true - this is something that a good a$$ whoopin would take care of. I was born a century too late...

 

[SSGSAD]

I'm in for the OC event, I will drive from Greenfield, and eat, just to see the show .....

 

[10-32]

Who did you talk to at the Police Dept, a dispatcher or a Sworn Officer? Not to sure about Indiana but in Ohio most departments only require a dispatcher to have a High School Diploma. They don't get any other formal training on Criminal Law.

From what I can find in the I.C. it does look like this guy could be charged with a some form of harrassment.

IC 35-45-10-2
"Harassment" defined
Sec. 2. As used in this chapter, "harassment" means conduct directed toward a victim that includes but is not limited to repeated or continuing impermissible contact that would cause a reasonable person to suffer emotional distress and that actually causes the victim to suffer emotional distress. Harassment does not include statutorily or constitutionally protected activity, such as lawful picketing pursuant to labor disputes or lawful employer-related activities pursuant to labor disputes.

 

[actaeon277]

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My suggestion....

Start surveillance on the place when the niece is working. When this chuckle head walks in and starts his spiel, walk up....

You - "you see that girl?"
Him - "yeah"
You - "she's my niece and I love her very much."
You - hand him a DVD of the movie "Taken" and walk away. Make sure to talk like Liam Neeson in the movie, too.

I love it. "Taken". Can I borrow that line indytechnerd?

 

[Liberty Sanders]

Who did you talk to at the Police Dept, a dispatcher or a Sworn Officer? Not to sure about Indiana but in Ohio most departments only require a dispatcher to have a High School Diploma. They don't get any other formal training on Criminal Law.

From what I can find in the I.C. it does look like this guy could be charged with a some form of harrassment.

IC 35-45-10-2
"Harassment" defined
Sec. 2. As used in this chapter, "harassment" means conduct directed toward a victim that includes but is not limited to repeated or continuing impermissible contact that would cause a reasonable person to suffer emotional distress and that actually causes the victim to suffer emotional distress. Harassment does not include statutorily or constitutionally protected activity, such as lawful picketing pursuant to labor disputes or lawful employer-related activities pursuant to labor disputes.

I think the critical term here is "impermissible contact."

At present, this guy is patronizing a business open to the public and showing inordinate interest in a young woman. Legally, there's nothing for a LEO to hang his hat on, even when the purpose of the man's interest is obvious.

But once this character has been NOTIFIED that his conduct is causing the aforementioned "emotional distress," a LEO has something to work with.

That's why someone needs to confront this guy (in a calm, non-hostile way) and the conversation needs to be witnessed.

 

[JohnP82]

Well all of the advice I had has already been posted.
Good for you for not taking this lightly, and great job on her part by recognizing the issue and taking action!

I hope all works out well and gets taken care of quickly and easily. Best of luck.

 

[hoosierdoc]

I would do most of what was said here, but faster! But then again, I play first person shooters so I'm accustomed to this sort of thing.

 

[halfmileharry]

It's sad that someone can disrupt anothers peaceful life. It leaves a bad taste in my life when the questionable actions of an older guy can have such a negative impact on a young person's life.
I'm all for a lawful course of action to handle this but....If the law's hands are tied I'd be keeping a vigil to make sure she's safe.
I wouldn't let anyone disrupt my life. I'm not a teen age girl though.
I'm old school too and when I was growing up it would have been handled with a baseball bat to the knees as an attention getter.
As stated above you need to make sure that the young girl is in a situation that is actually real. She might get the "creeps" on that particular person and it's no more than that.
Go the proper path and have the manager let him know in no uncertain terms that his presence makes for an uncomfortable situation.
IF the guy gets barred from the restaurant make darned sure he's not following the dad home and doing a recon on the girl.
I'd be watching him, getting pics or video, keep a log on him and his actions. Turn all info in to the police.
There's some darned good cops around and I'm sure they'd take notice of a bad situation.
After all they do have the power to really screw up someone's life IF so inclined. In a legal way of course.
Best of luck and a safe outcome with this.
IF you need any help keeping a safe perimeter just give a shout. I'll always stand with the EGA.

 

[Mgderf]

One bar of soap...

One tube sock...

One white sheet.

It's easy to hide behind cars in the parking lot.

"Blanket party!"

 

[jgreiner]

My niece, who is 15 works at a local restaurant as a hostess one day a week. A man in his 40's or 50's has been in there 10 times on the night she works, and is constantly asking very suspicious questions, such as where do you go to school, what nights you work, where do you hang out with your friends, where do you go to church, etc.

Up front, those don't seem more than small talk, but the way the questions were asked were very sneaky, and he sorta tricked her into answering them.

He made some comment to her after she talked to another male customer, like "So, you have other men that come in here on a regular basis to see you?" and she said it felt like a 'jealous' comment.

He has gone in there at least twice when she wasn't working, and turned around & left without eating.

She has asked me to come in there & do something about him next time he shows up, which will probably be tonight. Her dad has already called the police, but they said "So far, he hasn't done anything, so we can't do anything".

This type of creepy behaviour is something that child nappers display. How do I handle it without getting charges against me?

Had a brother that had that happen with his daughter. So one night, when the creeper usually showed up, my brother and three buddies entered the restaurant and sat down with the creeper. They started asking him the same questions he was asking my niece. He told them he didn't feel comfortable giving that info to strangers. They told him the girls working felt the same way, and to leave them alone. Or to expect more visits from the 4 of them. he got the message and left.

Now, in hind sight, that could have been a very bad situation. If the guy had been armed...who knows what would have happened.

My other brother has a better solution. All his kids are trained in Karate, and all fight competitively. His 14 year old is a 4th degree black belt, and regularly beats the h*ll out of adult men in the competitions. she has only had to use it outside a match once...as a 7th grader, when a HS junior stole her gym bag and was waving her bra around. Two quick knife hands...and he was on the floor crying.

I would as parent, go talk to the owner and ask him what he plans to do to protect his employees.

 

[jsx1043]

My suggestion....

Start surveillance on the place when the niece is working. When this chuckle head walks in and starts his spiel, walk up....

You - "you see that girl?"
Him - "yeah"
You - "she's my niece and I love her very much."
You - hand him a DVD of the movie "Taken" and walk away. Make sure to talk like Liam Neeson in the movie, too.

Can someone rep ITNerd for me? Apparently I have to spread the love first.


Concerned Citizen, please let me know if you get any information on him. I'll call my buddies at Hendricks County Sheriff and Brownsburg PD to see if they have anything on him.

 

[SmileDocHill]

The manager as said above.

This may have already been suggested. Has he paid with a credit card so that you know his name? I would run his name through the sex offender list, google it, and do some research. If it comes back with nothing you are still back to square one, but if it comes up that he is a documented douche bag then the Mgr will have a little easier time kicking him out.

 

[$mooth]

One bar of soap...

One tube sock...

One white sheet.

It's easy to hide behind cars in the parking lot.

That sounds like it could be advice for the creep or the uncle.

 

[Concerned Citizen]

Yes, after talking to the owner yesterday afternoon, I spent the next several hours parked outside the restaurant, with my camera & voice recorder ready. This is a Sushi joint in Avon. The owner is great, & hope he bans the guy like he said he would. And yes, she had the foresight to write his name down from two of his credit cards, which were different on each one. He is middle eastern, possibly Indian, so it's hard to tell which is his first name & which is his last, but I couldn't find anything on google.

I will continue to be vigilant on this issue until I have his picture & license number, & he is no longer coming around. Yes, I do find it humorous when some people suggest violence to solve this, but as many have said, he may be innocent and misguided, & I am not the type of person to lose my cool and escalate a situation.

 

[Amishman44]

I'm glad to see you're getting assistance from the manager...it'll be a big help in dealing with the creep. Handling the issue legally is the long way around...but in the end, you will have covered your @ss...and that's an important factor too!

This is a good teaching time for your daughter...about who/what's out there and how to protect herself!

Sad to see her in this situation...creeps are out there! Hope this works out for you!

My daughter (6) has won her green belt in Karate and is working on her purple. Her stated goal is that she wants to be a 1st degree black belt by the time she's a freshman in high school...so she can teach others. She's also becoming a crack shot with my 10/22 (from a rest...with a scope.) If she continues to develop her skills in the way that she has...and as a 15 year old she has to defend herself...I'm guessing I'm going to want to pull up a chair and bring some popcorn!

Right now, our discussions revolve around the proper application of 'self-defense.' (She's in 1st grade...so we're still very basic...but she asks some pretty complicated 'what if's?') Needless to say, we're very proud of her!

 

[NathanJefferson]

^^^^^^^^^ This....

However, it does not stop a real, dedicated stalker who has fixated on your niece. If this has happened there are very few good alternatives for her.

But I do agree on getting as much info as possible on the guy before banning him from the restaurant... pics, credit card number, car license, all with him knowing. It may be sufficient to focus his attention elsewhere.

Talk to the management and the above, minus the credit card number - thats illegal.

But after working in the restaurant business when I was younger - whenever this happened, which was pretty often, a talking to from the manager and letting them know that you have name, plates and picture on file usually gets the point across.

Usually they were just guys who pushed the line and noone ever pushed back so they kept going.

But the total of everything concerned - you gotta keep her safe and yourself out of trouble.

 

[concrete dog]

To CC, you are doing things the rite way. The gentlemen that I referred to in my earlier post WAS a registered perv. The reason I found him to talk was he just didn't get it when the law was talking to him.(he just kept up the behavior and would be gone when the law would show up). I was polite to him when I pointed out I knew what he was and I would protect my daughter NO MATTER WHAT. Just wait and see if the manager does what he said he would,and go from there.

 

[TTravis]

I live near enough to Avon and have a couple daughters that could easily find themselves in the same situation. If you would like some backup when you go to confront this guy, let me know. Us dads have to stick together when protecting our kids. We don't need that kind of crap in Hendricks County. I know you're not her father but you are acting line her father and that is commendable.

 

[pinshooter45]

Yes, after talking to the owner yesterday afternoon, I spent the next several hours parked outside the restaurant, with my camera & voice recorder ready. This is a Sushi joint in Avon. The owner is great, & hope he bans the guy like he said he would. And yes, she had the foresight to write his name down from two of his credit cards, which were different on each one. He is middle eastern, possibly Indian, so it's hard to tell which is his first name & which is his last, but I couldn't find anything on google.

I will continue to be vigilant on this issue until I have his picture & license number, & he is no longer coming around. Yes, I do find it humorous when some people suggest violence to solve this, but as many have said, he may be innocent and misguided, & I am not the type of person to lose my cool and escalate a situation.

You just can't be to carefull these days, too many young ladies go missing without a trace. This guy could be anything from someone who just likes to look at pretty girls, to a child molester, or worse yet involved in the sex slave trade. Some may say that's extreme but the Sex slave trade is the number two illegal money making enterprise just behind Drugs. Hope every thing turns out OK. I know I would be awful nervous and on pins and needles until this guy is dealt with properly. If you ever feel like you need a show of support, or show of force I'm up for a trip to help you out!

 

[printcraft]

Scarsdale, NY 10583 | At the 6-Month Mark-- No Sign of Spierer | Neighborhood News | Your Community Corner

Something evil happens every day........ Lauren Spierer has never been heard from again........

Keep an eye on your girl and BIG watch out for the freak-o.