It doesn't take smarts. The reality is once one commits to being Orthodox, one can just focus on working oneself. It's freeing in one sense to know its no longer just up to you to figure it all out. It does require one to think differently. It is tangentially related to our discussion of sinning and the Christians response to sin in one's life.
I recently had the occasion to revisit something I wrote in the past, over a decade ago, I believe.. I put it here, slightly edited and updated. I think I will work on it some more
Living a New Life
I have neither the experience or spiritual knowledge to lead others. So I write the following simple thoughts more for others to read and correct me in my misthought. Each of us has a methodology to our lives whether we reflect on it much or not. This is my first attempt to formally put to paper my methodology and I am sure it will be greatly revised, modified and in some aspects completely changed. Because I believe in cause and effect, my model is based on the consequences of living in linear time. With that brief introduction, I dive in.
Second by Second
This is the smallest time frame I consider. To be technically correct, I should title this “from the most infinitesimally measurable unit of time to one second” but that would be much too scholastic of me. These brief moments in time are the realm of thoughts. There are various schools of thought but I offer my own synthesis for consideration. Remembering my penchant for both the absolute and apophatic theology, I eliminate the possibility of arguing the neutral if I were to say thoughts can be for good or evil by saying thoughts can be for good or not. The Christian should strive to fill the mind with good thoughts. I believe this is one reason and actually the primary reason for the need of prayer without ceasing. The more we fill our thoughts with contemplation of the good, the less chance evil has to enter in. At one point in my life, I was practicing the Jesus Prayer, an Orthodox tradition that involves the repetition of a simple prayer. Two common variants are the following:
“Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”
“Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.”
Say it upon arising and while going through the automatic motions of the shower and dressing that require little conscious thought. Recite it while walking to and from the car, around the farm or office, and say while preparing for sleep. Make it the first thing said when awakening. Make the sign of the cross often.
The question to really consider is: are thoughts sins? Some say thoughts are not sins but rather temptations until we begin to dwell on them or even worse to act upon them. I will not presume to know any answers to the question, but offer my own thoughts on the matter. Many thoughts or temptations come to us because we have experienced the “pleasure” of them in the past. If I had lived as I ought I would not have knowledge of or recall the sensations of pleasure that acting upon such thoughts brings to myself. So even if thoughts are not sins in themselves, they are temporal punishments for the sins of our past because many times they recall past sins. My prayer, O Lord, Use these thoughts to create humility, for I have fallen before, use these thoughts for repentance because I have not filled my thoughts with good things, use these thoughts for thanksgiving for I have been forgiven, Amen.
Minute by Minute
We move from the realm of thought to action. It is here we must consider the butterfly effect of our actions on others. No action is truly isolated. All action we take must be for the good in the framework as established above with assumption that no thought can be both good and not good at the same time so with actions. The Christian should strive to fill his life with good actions. In the realm of minutes is where so many sins are committed for me. Most of us don't spend hours, days, months or years planning to sin, I sin minute by minute. Most often these sins are expressed verbally. I tear down my fellow man, I share others failings with a third party. I fail to perceive the needs of my brother and meet them. I set my own needs above all others and meet them unfailingly. Actions are decisions made based on thoughts whether conscious or unconscious. As I began my Christian walk, most sins I committed were based on unconscious thought manifesting itself in actions because I was simply acting out the desires of the heart. Most good actions resulted from conscious thought as I began the struggle against the habitual actions of the past. Here is a real danger for as I begin to consciously change, the sin of pride can easily creep in as I admire the new changes in my life and want to take credit for them. Here we encounter the first need for Confession. As a young Christian, I see and begin to identify, through the grace and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ, the unconscious thoughts that lead me to sin and I begin to struggle to uproot them using the weapons of prayer, fasting, confession, the eucharist, reading of scripture and the lives of the saints. The filling of the mind with spiritual thoughts and the action of dwelling upon them.
At the beginning of the walk, the mountain of unconscious thoughts that lead to sin would seem insurmountable, but I believe that the true magnitude of our sinfulness is concealed from ourselves to some degree to keep us from despair. The joy though, is that God forgives and does not give us more work than we can handle at one time. As we mature as Christians, I believe our conscious thoughts and actions towards the good become unconscious as we become more habitual Christians than habitual sinners. Slowly, the sinfulness of our unconscious thoughts and actions are supplanted as our conscious thoughts and actions towards the good move into the realm of unconsciousness and become habitual. And slowly God imparts to us more knowledge of things in our lives that still need work. I believe this is why some saints consider themselves so sinful. At any moment in time, we struggle against the passions and we see some successes and failures, but we keep on pressing towards the good.
Hour by Hour
Here we encounter goals. Our thoughts move into actions but the linking of multiple actions contribute to the realization of a goal. Here we have the beginning of reflection. The conscious often lets us know immediately of any wrongdoing and how I choose to react says a lot about my spiritual health. Do I know that I have wronged someone, but hesitate to apologize? I am in need of humility and forfeit the blessing promised to the meek. Do I hesitate to apologize because there are too many people around who may hear? I not only need humility but am suffering from pride and thus breaking the second commandment by making myself a god. Forgiveness should fit the crime. Ideally, if I sin, I confess and ask forgiveness in front of everyone who saw or heard the deed immediately. As a Christian my goal is to love the Lord my God with all my heart, and with all my soul, and with all my mind and to love my neighbor as myself. To achieve this completely I must orient all my thoughts and actions towards this goal. The first hours of the day are often spent getting ready for the days labors. Do I thank God upon awakening that I have been blessed to draw breath another day, or do I believe I am self-sustaining? Do I set aside a time for prayer asking for guidance throughout the day, or do I rely on my own judgment? Do I look around me and thank God for all the comforts He has blessed me with, or do I lust after the one thing I don't have breaking the tenth commandment? Do I use the drive to work as a time for prayer and reflection or do I already feel the seeds of anger at the person slowing me down thus robbing myself of the blessing given to the pure in heart? Do I thank God that I have a job to go to, or do I grumble because the parking spot I normally use closer to the door has been taken? At work, the spiritual goal becomes even more distant, but is still there, psychology tells us that repetitive tasks take little conscious thought. Do I thank God upon arriving at work that I have gainful employment, or do I grumble about the boss's ingratitude? Do I ask His help to accomplish whatever task is set before me each time I begin my work? Do I use this to my advantage and remain in prayer or do I yield to the temptation to engage in gossip thus breaking the ninth commandment? Do I take a spare moment to read a spiritually nourishing poem or short article or do I engage in disparaging the work of a coworker depriving myself of the blessing of the peacemakers? Even more abstract, is the ultimate goal of work. Do I ask God to make me a good steward of all that He has blessed me with, or do I squander a portion of my wages because I deserve a break thus breaking the first commandment and losing the blessing promised to the poor in spirit? At the end of the work day, do I thank God for the opportunity to work, or do I congratulate myself for making it through another day? Do I exhibit love and patience to my fellow man on my way home or do I break the second commandment of Christ? Upon arriving at home, do I choose to watch TV and give up the blessing promised to those who hunger and thirst after righteousness or do I choose to read and meditate on scripture? Do I read my latest magazine or do I read about the life of the saint of the day? It is easiest to recognize that spiritual goals “compete” for my leisure time, but there is chore time around the house, as I mow the yard. Do I choose to listen to secular music on the mp3 player or do I say the Jesus Prayer? As the hour for sleep approaches do I thank God for his blessings of the day and the enjoyment of good health? Do I ask for his safekeeping of myself and my possessions that he has given me? Do I let the cares of the world weigh down my mind as I lay upon my bed or do I pray unceasingly?
Day by Day
The period of a day gives us the first real opportunity for reflection. At the end of each day, how I answered each question above offer a telling view into whether or not I made any spiritual progress. The morning should be spent in thankfulness for a restful sleep and requesting God's mercy to come upon us to allow the work of the day at hand to be fruitful for the kingdom. The evening should be spent examining the day and asking forgiveness for shortcomings. This cyclical cleansing is very important for if I forget that each day is a fresh start, I am open to the sin of dispair and despondency because I deny God forgives me. The realm of the individual resides mostly in the second to second, minute to minute, and hour to hour in my view, as we move into the longer timespans, the influence of the corporate aspect of Salvation becomes more apparent. The Day marks the beginning of a formal structure that can be applied to our lives based on the witness of the Church. The daily cycle of worship.
The Orthodox day runs from sunset to sunset so the first service of the day is vespers, a sunset service. During vespers we offer thanks for God's mercy during the day and ask for His blessing throughout the evening. The service contrasts the coming darkness with the arrival of the light of the world. We read Psalm 102 calling to mind that it is God's creation of which we are a part and it is God who sustains us. Using Psalms 140, 141, and 116 we cry out to God for His mercy and praise Him. We sing the hymn “O Gladsome Light” which is the oldest known hymn of the Church outside the bible and we ask for a peaceful and sinless evening.
Then the Complines service which is meant as an after dinner prayer before retiring to sleep. Here we thank God for rest from our labors and call to mind death through the metaphor of sleep, asking God to keep us by praying the Psalms 50, 69, 142 which have a penitential quality, especially 50.
The Midnight Office, usually observed in monasteries only, at midnight can also be observed by the lay person upon awakening. Here we welcome the Bridegroom and glorify the Resurrection. We call to mind Christ who prayed at midnight. We are reminded of the unceasing prayer and praise of the angels. We read Psalm 50 and then on Monday through Friday read Psalm 118 in its entirety. Other Psalms are selected for Saturday. Midnight should not be taken literally, for it can be at 4 or 5 am, ie in the middle of the night.
Matins, or morning prayers, begin with six Psalms 3, 37, 62, 87, 102, and 142. We open the day praising God using Psalms 148, 149, and 150.
First Hour, an opportunity to pray before any activity of the day.
The Third Hour, prayer of thanks for Pentecost and reflection on Christ was condemned by Pilate.
The Sixth Hour, we recall the handing over of Jesus to the Jews and his crucifixion and sacrifice for our sins.
The Ninth Hour, the death of our Savior upon the cross.
At each hour, the following pray is prayed.
Thou who at every season and every hour, in Heaven and on earth art worshipped and glorified, O Christ God; long-suffering, merciful and compassionate; Who lovest the just and showest mercy upon the sinner; Who callest all to salvation through the promise of blessings to come. O Lord, in this hour receive our supplications, and direct our lives according to Thy commandments.
Sanctify our souls. Purify our bodies. Correct our minds; cleanse our thoughts; and deliver us from all tribulations, evil, and distress. Surround us with Thy holy angels; that, guided and guarded by them, we may attain to the unity of the faith, and unto the knowledge of Thine unapproachable glory. For Thou art blessed unto ages of ages. Amen.
All of these services can be done as a reader service either by purchasing a book or downloading one of the texts available on the internet.
There are even abbreviated services which are really just short selections of prayers specific to each hour.
My next sections will be Week by Week, In those I will cover the specific dedication of each week and why we fast on Wed and Fri. Sunday as the 1st and 8th day, The 11 week cycle of resurrectional readings and the 8 weekly tone cycle. Finally, I hope to write about the Yearly Cycle including the feasting and fasting sessions (Nativity, Lent, etc), the 12 Great Feasts of the Church and Pascha, or the Feast of Feasts. Those sections will be more interesting to people with more than a casual interest in Orthodoxy so I won't be posting them here, but I thought the above might be relevant to our discussions.
