I'd go with any CZ. For a mid-size the CZ 75 Compact has the manual safety or the CZ 75 PCR or CZ 75 P-01 have a decocker. I have the P-01 and it is one of my favorite guns
I have a SR9C and absolutely love it the feel and trigger pull fit me perfectly, I have buddies that have a Glock, 1911 and XDM. I'm not a fan of how the Glock is weighted, the 1911 (which I know is not a 9mm) I love but is a bit pricey. I really liked the XDM but I shot it after buying the SR9C. As far as reliability my SR9C has seen a couple 1000 rounds of everything from quality hollow points to cheap steel ammo with out any problems other then a few rounds that were duds. I think as long as you by a quality gun its all about how it fits you
The CZ is a good one to start with. I have always owned semi auto's with a decock/hammer block safety and since that I have shied away from glock even though my friends all love them. I bought an XDM 9mm because it has a palm safety like the 1911 as well as the trigger safety. I now love this gun. It is available with a Brite slide too.
Best 9mm? Thats a hard decision for me! It would be either a CZ 75, Beretta 92fs, or a Smith 5906! But, if I had to choose one, it would be the Smith 5906!
M&P Shield 9mm. not a bad recoil at all. Heard folks talk about the 40 cal recoil. Although I have big hands so its just a nice carry gun cause of size. Not fun at range for me.
Merry Christmas!
Another vote for the CZ 75. The "D" is an alloy frame with a decocker. The "C" is a steel frame with a safety. The P-01 is an alloy frame with a rail and decocker. The "B" is full size. There are also polymer versions, etc.
While not well known here in the USA, based on worldwide sales CZ outsells Glock, Sig, etc and is carried by more police and military than any other brand.
The CZ-75 is a great pistol. Not awful looking either. But to be honest, the best 9mm is the 9mm that you personally like the most. There are a lot of reliable and some good looking 9's out there.