For a first gun I always recommend a gun with a decocker/safety, and those are almost always the DA/SA guns. So take a look at: Ruger P95, Beretta 92FS and PX4, and such. Despite what all the people say, safeties and decockers are useful, and not outdated technology, especially when you are new to handling weapons and need extra assurance that it won't go off accidentally. Most striker fired DAO pistols have no safety, and also require you to pull the trigger to decock them every time you want to break them down for cleaning, which is a recipe for disaster for a beginner. Of course, if you always enforce strict safety, and you learn to check the chamber multiple times visually prior to every dry fire, you'll be fine. But a decocker/safety eliminates the need to always be so paranoid, because you don't have to pull the trigger to decock, and even if you did pull the trigger after decocking it would be impossible to discharge the weapon without first disengaging the safety/decocker!
Reason #2 for a safety: If you ever put your pistol in a glove box or drawer without a holster covering the trigger, then it could accidentally discharge easier without a safety. For example, if you grab the gun and don't know a pen has been wedged into the trigger housing, simply moving the gun could engage the trigger, but not if the safety is on. One time I grabbed my gun out of the side of the car door, and it had shifted, so I couldn't grip the handle well, and thought my finger was on the outside of the trigger housing wen i lifted it was on the actual trigger--luckily safety was on (I pretty much always keep in a holster now too, even though it will take longer to access in an emergency). Be aware that things shifting in a drawer can potentially disengage the safety too though.
Lastly, I always turn the safety off and have a loaded chamber when carrying, so the safety does not get in the way. When a holster covers the trigger then the holster IS the safety.
Sorry to rant, but every time I'm in a gun store I hear the guy behind the counter telling beginners that safeties are essentially dumb, and that they should buy a Glock. It is more important that you are comfortable with the weapon you choose IMO.
With all due respect, I disagree with some things that are said here. Many of the reasons you state that a safety/decocker are good seem to be complete negligence. For example, you state: "If you ever put your pistol in a glove box or drawer without a holster covering the trigger." Why in the world would you put a loaded gun in a drawer or glove box without the trigger being covered?
Yes, a person new to guns may not be as confident with them initially, but you don't need an engineering degree to operate them. I think someone who has been around guns has just as much of a chance of an ND as a person new to them because of complacency. I think the best thing any new gun owner can do is to take a basic gun safety class to learn the rules of gun safety, learn marksmanship, and solidify good safe gun handling.
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