Never been under an HOA. Fees being a big turn off for me, particularly fees that can change based on a neighborhood vote. Sort of like a trailer park without the wheels, someone else controls a portion of your "lot rent".
I currently own three pieces of property. One is very rural. I liked living there. My wife would not. It'd also be something like a 2 hour commute, which I would not like and until recently would not have been legally permissible due to residency requirements. The second is an older house on a small lot in a small town. You can very much expect rednecks doing redneck things due to the location and the pricing. I'm ok with rednecks doing redneck things. My wife, not so much.
My primary residence is in a 1950's bedford stone or brick subdivision (ours is stone). The lots are not quite an acre. Most of my neighbors are now Bhurmese. They keep to themselves, take better care of their lawns then I do, but apparently hate trees. I don't really see what an HOA could do for me other than perhaps plow the snow, which the city doesn't do.
There is an old van with expired plates parked in a driveway of one of the remaining white families. I could probably call the Mayor's Action line and get it addressed, or just complain directly. I don't care. It's not a hive of killer bees, it's an old van. So I don't because it's none of my business.
Similar here, near White River/Broadripple with 1.8 acres. No HOA. I had a boat in my driveway for <6 mos., I do brake jobs and oil changes for friends. Have a couple large parties with bonfires every few years. Never a complaint.
I always let my neighbors know what I am planning and invite them as well. I have lots of parking space due to a drive-thru driveway and allow neighbors guests to park in it for their large parties keeping cars off the street and lawns.
The HOA's that try to ban flags and other patriotic symbols? Well, they can su** ** ****.