As I look back on this I realize the mistakes I made. At the time I was actually relying on the door guy to help me out and then I realized he was not going to help me. As a female, I and most females tend to lean to a man for protection. I mean yes we can carry a gun but we still depend on our men for most of our protection. That was a mistake on my part as well. This is not to go over all of my mistakes but just to admit that I did make mistakes and I have learned a great deal from this.
I am very thankfull this did not excalate out of control and that noone got hurt especailly me. This has been pretty dramatic for me and of course I have been second guessing myself. I see this guys face at night when I try to sleep. Hopefully soon this will all go away.
I have been in a few scrapes over the years, and after any fight I have ever been in I have replayed the incident over a million times in my head EVERYTIME. You can't really control it, it just takes time to get over it. You did fine, but you are 100% correct when you said you let your guard down, we all do it, thinking were safe when we are really exposed and unaware.
Try not to beat yourself up, but use it to raise your situational awareness. Good luck.