I found this and thought some Mosin owners would get a kick out of it.
A very long internet classic:
AR15: You can pick off prairie dogs at 300 meters all day long
AK47: You can pick off a deer pretty easy at 300 meters
Mosin-Nagant: You get out of your truck, see an elk on top of a hill, and realize you really can use iron sights that far.
AR15: You measure your misses by sub MOA measurements
AK47: You miss and, and aim a bit lower this time.
Mosin-Nagant: Even if you miss the shockwave of the bullet will kill the animal.
AR15: You are careful to keep in clean in the field.
AK47: You don’t worry so much about some dirt getting in it.
Mosin-Nagant: It still has gritty grease inside it from when the Finnish army put it into storage.
AR15: Your bayonet will do an alright job of butchering your kill if needed.
AK47: The bayonet doubles as a decent hunting knife.
Mosin-Nagant: Your bayonet can be used to spit roast an entire pig.
AR15: Nice and light for carrying over obstructions.
AK47: Handy package for carrying over obstructions.
Mosin-Nagant: You can pole vault over obstructions.
AR15: Can’t run dry or you get seizure.
AK47: Can run dry, but may cause laquered ammo to stick in chamber.
Mosin-Nagant: Just handling the bolt gives it enough oil to operate smoothly.
Lots more after the break!
What your wife does after she finds out you spent the tax refund / stimulus payment on a -
AR15: She yells at you for spending the whole thing on a plastic varmint rifle.
AK47: She is disappointed at what an ugly rifle you spent half of it on.
Mosin-Nagant: She doesn’t even notice the Mosin-Nagant because of the diamond ring you got her with all the left over cash.
AR15: Melts IN the fire
AK47: Starts ON fire
Mosin-Nagant: Starts THE fire
AR15: With a custom barrel, Varmint Scope, and gunsmith trigger job, you can vaporize prairie dogs at 600 yards.
AK47: With a good rain, you can wait hidden in the mud at the side of a watering hole and wait for the game to come to you for a shot within 10 yards.
Mosin-Nagant: With a solid shooting position, you can hit that deer on the other side of the valley… and recover the bullet in the tree it was standing in front of.
AR15: You can buy 100 round magazines that require dry-carbon lubricant.
AK47: You can do push-ups on your 30 round steel mag (Saw this in a SPETSNATZ documentary).
Mosin-Nagant: You can use the buttstock to pound in a tent stake and if you don’t have tent stakes, the bayonet will work as one.
AR-15: Carried by elite special forces and highly-trained American soldiers
AK-47: Carried by illiterate peons and unwilling conscripts.
Mosin-Nagant-Nagant: Carried by Vassily Zaitsev.
AR15: Might just stop that charging terrorist with a three round burst
AK47: Would stop the terrorist in his tracks
Mosin-Nagant: Would stop the charging terrorist, his three buddies, and blow up the IED in the next block from the shockwave of the bullet…
AR15: Shoots a .22.
AK47: Shoots a carbine round.
Mosin-Nagant: Shoots a cannonball.
AR15: Shot by the free world
AK47: Shot at the free world
Mosin-Nagant: Almost free to shoot
AR15: Shoot it in the air it goes a mile
AK47: Shoot it in the air it goes 1/2 a mile
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot it in the air and someone in Berlin gets hit by a bullet.
AR15: Made out of used cars and recycled milk jugs
AK47: Made out of oil rigs and packing crates
Mosin-Nagant: Made out of old water pipe and goat carts
AR15: Sounds like a pop gun
AK47: Sounds like a machine gun
Mosin-Nagant: Sounds like the Trinity Atomic Blast
AR15: Sometimes mistaken for a toy
AK47: Sometimes mistaken for random parts
Mosin-Nagant: Sometimes mistaken for an artillery piece, or an anti-aircraft gun
AR15: Pray (it works) and spray
AK47: Spray and pray(you hit something)
Mosin-Nagant: The hammer of God
AR15: Makes grown men laugh.
AK47: Makes grown men cry.
Mosin-Nagant: Makes grown men incontinent.
AR15: Finicky when dirty.
AK47: Still works when dirty.
Mosin-Nagant: Arrives Dirty from the Distributor.
AR15: Don’t run over it…it will Break
AK47: Run over it, it still shoots.
Mosin-Nagant: Run over it and it will flatten your Tires!
AR15: Makes a Pop when fired
AK47: Makes a Boom when fired
Mosin-Nagant: What the hell was that ???
AR15: Ok, I got One!
AK47: Ok, I have 3 different ones.
Mosin-Nagant: Ok, I have Mosin-itis and have 14 and looking for More….
AR15: Makes a small hole in a tree
AK47: Makes a medium sized hole in a tree
Mosin-Nagant: Blows tree in half making firewood available.
AR15: Kills rabbits and coyotes
AK47: Kills pigs and small deer
Mosin-Nagant: If you can’t kill it with a Mosin-Nagant, it can’t be killed
AR15: Safe to stow in poly bags
AK47: Safe to stow in a rice paddy
Mosin-Nagant: Safe to stow in a landfill
AR15: 100 round beta c drum mags you can load with a speed loader
AK47: 75 round drum magazine you have to reload individually by pressing a lever
Mosin-Nagant: You can store 20 of them in a drum with about 1000 rounds on stripper clips
AR15: Has a nice Airsoft copy
AK47: Has a nice Airsoft copy
Mosin-Nagant: Who needs Airsoft when you can fire blanks.
AR15: Makes a nice paperweight
AK47: Makes a nice doorstop
Mosin-Nagant: Makes a nice baseball bat and way cheaper then aluminum
AR15: Loyal following of people that have more money than sense.
AK47: Loyal following of people that have a longer police record than the range of the rifle.
Mosin-Nagant: Loyal following of people that have more rounds of ammo than they got hairs on all family members’ heads combined.
AR-15: Your enemies will giggle
AK-47: Your enemies will take cover and swear as they ready their weapons
Mosin-Nagant: Your enemies will flatten themselves to the ground and offer up prayers of salvation to whatever god they believe in…then they will die.
AR-15: Drop it from ten feet and it shatters.
AK-47: Drop it from ten feet and it still works.
Mosin-Nagant: Drop it from ten feet and it’s more lethal than a lawn dart.
AR-15: You can melt it with a magnifying glass.
AK-47: Under a magnifying glass, you can see the ingrained dirt.
Mosin-Nagant: Under a magnifying glass, you can see the soaked-in BLOOD.
AR-15: Safe, Semiautomatic, Full-Auto (more like full-JAM)
AK-47: Safe(dubious), Semiautomatic, Full-Auto
Mosin-Nagant: Kill, Maim, Destroy
AR-15: When you run out of ammo, duck for cover and spend 15 minutes cleaning and reloading
AK-47: You could probably rig it up to fire chain-linked ammo
Mosin-Nagant: When you run out of ammo (never) you can shoot chaff and langrage from it (wikipedia that)
AR-15: My daddy bought me this weapon for my birthday
AK-47: I saved two weeks’ paychecks to buy this.
Mosin-Nagant: I think it was free…
AR-15: My rifle floated away in the flood
AK-47: My rifle was submerged for three weeks by the flood and still works
Mosin-Nagant: I fired my rifle and the flood waters parted…
AR15: You keep your bayonet in the kitchen because it is a good steak knife
AK47: You keep your bayonet in your toolbox because it is a good wire cutter
Mosin-Nagant: You no longer fix your bayonet in the house because the last time you did you poked a hole in the ceiling when you stood up
AR15: For $1000 you can get one
AK47: For $1000 you can get two and 300 rounds of ammo
Mosin-Nagant: For $1000 you can get 16 of them plus a Bulgarian armory’s worth of surplus ammo
AR15: Can start brush fires with incendiary ammunition.
AK47: Can start brush fires by dropping it after the handguard catches fire.
Mosin-Nagant: Can start brush fires by firing from anything lower than a kneeling position.
AR15: Built with custom parts, nice trigger, all the bells and whistles $1500+
AK47: Modified with aftermarket and 1,000 rounds of ammo not even $1500
Mosin-Nagant: Stock, with 1,000 rounds maybe $300, meaning you get $1200 to spend on more beer
AR15: Takes a few men out in a sweeper movement
AK47: Takes most men out in a sweeper movement
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot one the sonic boom will handle the rest
AR15: Used in negotiations
AK47: Reason for negotiations
Mosin-Nagant: Negotiator
AR15: I think I felt it kick
AK47: Kinda like a 20 guage
Mosin-Nagant: Dislocation
Mosin-Nagant with heavy ball: Where’s my freaking shoulder
AR15: Takes 3 rounds to take out your enemy
AK47: takes 30 rounds sprayed and hopefully you hit your target
Mosin-Nagant: 1 shot, 50 kills
AR15: More options than a custom Rolls-Royce. No two guns are alike.
AK47: Same number of options as a Toyota Corolla. Most guns look alike.
Mosin-Nagant: Options: You want a bayonet with that?
The limits of customizing a-
AR15: How much $ you got.
AK47: What you can find in the Tapco catalog.
Mosin-Nagant: How much duct tape Bubba’s got.
AR15: Such light recoil, you could put on over your balls and fire.
AK47: Recoil manageable enough for anyone to use it.
Mosin-Nagant: Recoil that registers as small tremors in the earth itself.
AR15: Bullet starts tumbling the moment it meets sufficient resistance, like paper
AK47: Bullet will continue trajectory until it hits something solid, like a deer
Mosin-Nagant: It keeps going and going and going….
AR15: You probably drive a Lexus
AK47: If you’re lucky to possess a vehicle, it’s referred to as a “Technical”
Mosin-Nagant: You hang truck-balls off your trailer hitch, and you’re proud of them.
AR15: Lots of fancy optics available
AK47: You can bolt some stuff to the side
Mosin-Nagant: Who cares about optics when the barrel is long enough to smack the enemy over the head without even leaving your foxhole.
AR15: Used by special forces to kill terrorists
AK47: Used by revolutionaries and any two bit nation’s illiterate conscripts to kill each other
Mosin-Nagant: Used by Simo Häyhä to kill Russian conscripts
AR15: Requires over 1000 rounds to break in
AK47: May need some breaking in
Mosin-Nagant: The stripper clips require more breaking in
AR15: Can take down smaller sized game.
AK47: Can take down average sized game.
Mosin-Nagant: Can take down satellites.
AR15: Invented 50 years ago by a consummate engineer
AK47: Invented 60 years ago by wounded tank sergeant
Mosin-Nagant: Invented 117 years ago by two drunks on a budget.
AR15: Star wars
AK47: Holy wars
Mosin-Nagant: Class wars
AR15: Makes small holes
AK47: Makes big holes
Mosin-Nagant: Makes black holes
AR15: Nice lightweight ammo can be carried in quantity.
AK47: You can carry a chest pouch with lots of mags with no problem.
Mosin-Nagant: Ammo is also used in tanks, and larger artillery pieces.
Domestic uses of the bayonet:
AR15: You affix it to your rifle and use it as a dibble to plant tulip bulbs in the garden.
AK47: You affix it to your rifle and use it to trim low-hanging tree branches.
Mosin-Nagant: You affix it to your rifle, accidentally stab it into the ceiling and bring down a square foot of plaster, and spend the next week sleeping on the couch because your wife is pissed off at you.
AR15: Comes in Pink Hello Kitty and Barbie
AK47: Comes in Pink Hello Kitty
Mosin-Nagant: What’s pink?
AR15: Iran-Contra was a cover-up
AK47: Afghanistan (1980) was a cover-up
Mosin-Nagant: Chernobyll was a cover-up
You call the thing with the ammo in it a “clip” and…
AR15: Your buddies glare at you and don’t speak to you for a month.
AK47: Your buddies smile at you with their gold teeth and “blast another cap.”
Mosin-Nagant: Your buddies smile at you because it’s one of the few times you all get to call something a “clip”… and be right.
AR15: Clean with fancy lubes and solvents with special tools.
AK47: Clean? In Soviet Russia AK clean you!
Mosin-Nagant: Squirt some Windex down the bore. Ready for another 500 rounds tomorrow!
AR15: You can be an expert with this rifle after basic training
AK47: You can be an expert with this rifle after a seminar at the Holiday Inn on AKs
Mosin-Nagant: You can be an expert with this rifle after spending 30 minutes on the internet reading forums, and watching youtube videos
AR15: Can shoot a squirrel and have a great meal
AK47: Can shoot a squirrel and have some meat left to eat.
Mosin-Nagant: There is a tail left around here somewhere.
AR15: Puts some countries air force to shame
AK47: Used by countries who can’t afford an air force
Mosin-Nagant: Could be used to take down an air force
AR15: Shoot one and you’ll be owning one soon!
AK47: Shoot one and you will buy some high capacity magazines and 1000 rounds of ammo
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot one and you will own 15 and want another!
AR15: Goes pew pew pew
AK47: Goes pow pow pow
Mosin-Nagant: Goes BOOOOOOOM!
AR15: Made by a stoned Eugene
AK47: Made by an injured Kalashnikov
Mosin-Nagant: Made by a drunken Belgian and a crazy Ivan
Owners drink of choice
AR15: Cognac
AK47: Malt liquor
Mosin-Nagant: Brake cleaner
AR15: Makes a tiny hole with no fragmentation or undue extra injury, in accordance with the Geneva Convention
AK47: Makes a big hole and sometimes flings severed body parts around, not in accordance with the Geneva Convention
Mosin-Nagant: One of the reasons the Geneva Convention was written
AR15: Can shoot it off your head and it won’t kill you
AK47: Shoot it off your head and you die
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot if from your shoulder and you need it popped back into place
AR15: Used to kill Enemies of the State.
AK47: Used by Enemies of the State.
Mosin-Nagant: Enemy at the Gates.
AR15: Good for shooting poodles.
AK47: Good for shooting enemies of the state
Mosin-Nagant: Good for shooting light armored vehicles
AR15: Keeps gunsmiths in business
AK47: Keeps drug dealers and terrorists in business
Mosin-Nagant: Keeps Chiropractors in business
AR15: Built like a Toy.
AK47: Built like a Sewing Machine.
Mosin-Nagant: Built like a Tank!
AR15: Too much Plastic.
AK47: Too Much Sheet metal.
Mosin-Nagant: Too much of everything!
AR15: stays in the Vault.
AK47: not allowed in the vault.
Mosin-Nagant: Can be used to Pole Vault!
AR15: In your Heart you think it’s ugly.
AR15: In your Heart you know it’s ugly.
Mosin-Nagant: You’re afraid to call it ugly!
AR15: It doesn’t go anywhere near <shudder> water… Unless you’re drinking Evian
AK47: If water touches it, it would mistake it for a cleaning solvent and fall apart
Mosin-Nagant: Row-row-row your boat, gently down the Volga…
AR15: If it gets in the Mekong river, you need to clean it before firing.
AK47: If it gets in the Mekong river, shake the water out before firing.
Mosin-Nagant: Used as an oar to paddle up and down the Mekong river
AR15: Used to attack soldiers building a bridge across the Mekong
AK47: Used to protect soldiers building a bridge across the Mekong
Mosin-Nagant: Used to actually build the bridge across the Mekong.
AR15: Plastics make it possible
AK47: Sheet metal make it possible
Mosin-Nagant: Driftwood make it possible
AR15: Nice useful little round.
AK47: Very functional round.
Mosin-Nagant: Anti Tank Round
AR15: Useful against unarmored foe
AK47: Useful against armored foe
Mosin-Nagant: Useful against foe on the other side of the battlefield!
AR15: Useful for hosing down forward edge of the battle area…
AK47: Useful for hosing down sky over forward edge of the battle area…
Mosin-Nagant: Useful for hosing down rear of the battle area, enemy reserves and basic training camps at home…
AR15: Thousands of moving parts, held together by hundreds of bolts, screws, and precision welds.
AK47: Several dozen moving parts, held together by a few screws and some drunken Ivan’s light-sabering with an acetylene torch.
Mosin-Nagant: TWO MOVING PARTS. TWO SCREWS. .
AR15: Owner votes for John McCain
AK47: Owner prays for Barack Hussein Osama
Mosin-Nagant: Owner can overthrow the government no matter who becomes president.
AR15: One tenth the firepower at 10 times the price
AK47: Half the Firepower at twice the price
Mosin-Nagant: 10 times the firepower at one tenth the price
AR15: Turns little rocks into pebbles
AK47: Turns big rocks into little rocks
Mosin-Nagant: Makes molehills out of mountains
AR15: One inch groups at 100 yards.
AK47: Five to six inch groups at 100 yards.
Mosin-Nagant: Muzzle is one inch from target at 100 yards.
AR15: Designs drawn on blueprint paper by stoner and a team of experts in a R&D facility
AK47: Designs drawn on notebook paper by Kalashnikov in a Soviet hospital
Mosin-Nagant: Designs drawn on cocktail napkins by a drunken Sergei Mosin-Nagant in a bar
AR15: Clean with a bunch of cloths, patches, picks, brushes and don’t loose the small parts. Clean every 100 rounds.
AK47: Run a patch down the barrel, wipe out the chamber every few months.
Mosin-Nagant: Throw it in the dishwasher every couple years.
AR15: New shooters love it because of good ergonomics and light recoil.
AK47: New shooters love it because of light recoil.
Mosin-Nagant: New shooters required to sign a waiver-absolving owner of physical damage incurred from recoil
AR15: Usually equipped with flash hider to reduce muzzle flash.
AK47: Can be equipped with flash hider to reduce muzzle flash.
Mosin-Nagant: Muzzle flash can be used to summon the mother ship.
AR15: Can be used to defend home against crooks
AK47: Can be used to defend Oil Tanker against Pirates
Mosin-Nagant: Can Replace one of the Deck Guns on the Kirov Class Battle cruiser
AR-15: Defenders
AK-47: Invaders
Mosin-Nagant: Victors
AR15: High cost, high maintenance.
AK47: Low cost, low maintenance.
Mosin-Nagant: What are these cost and maintenance things you speak of?
AR15: Your rifle takes a few hours to sight in, starting at 50 yard and moving up to 200, making minute adjustments with a small screwdriver.
AK47: You slide your rear sight around until you hit the target.
Mosin-Nagant: You hit your rifle with a hammer to sight it.
AR15: Arm of the free world
AK47: Arm of everybody else
Mosin-Nagant: Arm of Chuck Norris
AR15: Politicians fear it.
AK47: Media fears it.
Mosin-Nagant: Zombies fear it!
At an indoor range.
AR15: Gets people’s attention because of it’s wonderful accuracy.
AK47: Gets people’s attention because of it’s rugged reliability.
Mosin-Nagant: Gets people’s attention because muzzle flash sets off sprinkler system!
As for accurizing.
AR15: You buy match grade components installed by professional gunsmith and spend thousands of dollars.
AK47: You buy GOOD ammo and optics and spend hundreds of dollars.
Mosin-Nagant: You use an empty soda can, some sand paper and spend seven bucks!
AR15: You can put one hole in a paper target at 100 meters with 30 rounds.
AK47: You can put a .30″ hole through 12″ of oak, if you can hit it.
Mosin-Nagant: You can knock down everyone else’s target with the shock wave of your bullet going downrange.
AR15: When out of ammo, your rifle makes a great whiffle bat.
AK47: When out of ammo your rifle will nominally pass as a club.
Mosin-Nagant: When out of ammo, your rifle makes a supreme war club, pike, boat oar, tent pole, or firewood.
AR15: What’s recoil?
AK47: Recoil is manageable, even fun.
Mosin-Nagant: Recoil is often used to relocate shoulders thrown out by the previous shot.
AR15: Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of minute of angle.
AK47: Your sight adjustment goes to “10″, and you’ve never bothered moving it.
Mosin-Nagant: Your sight adjustment goes to 12 miles and you’ve actually tried it.
AR15: After a day at the range, you detail strip your rifle and thoroughly clean and lubricate it with only the best products.
AK47: After a day of shooting out back you run a quick patch through the bore and throw your rifle in the back of your truck.
Mosin-Nagant: Cleaning….and maintenance?
AR15: Millennium Falcon
AK47: Star Destroyer
Mosin-Nagant: The Death Star
As for accessories.
AR15: You have a never ending list of high dollar tacticool accessories.
AK47: You have a never ending list of Chinese made tacticool accessories.
Mosin-Nagant: You have carry strap and ammo what more you need comrade?
AR15: Cost a lot of money
AK47: Cost some money
Mosin-Nagant: free with purchase of bayonet
AR15: Backordered.
AK47: Backordered.
Mosin-Nagant: Mail ordered.
AR15: When out of ammo you would rather die than risk damaging your $1200 rifle buy using it as a club.
AK47: When out of ammo your rifle makes a nice club.
Mosin-Nagant: Your rifle is a club that can shoot people.
AR15: When on patrol in Vietnam ammo is so light you can carry around 900 rounds of ammo with you.
AK47: When patrolling your warlord’s territory, you carry all the ammo you need in the back of a technical.
Mosin-Nagant: When sent to battle at Stalingrad you are only issued a stripper clip of ammunition and told that you would find your rifle laying on the ground.
AR15: Got it by joining army
AK47: Got it with one paycheck
Mosin-Nagant: Got it by saving beer cans
On prairie dogs:
AR15: You sit back with your buddies poopin them all day long 651hits 3 misses.
AK47: You and another person go to a dog-town fire 4,000 rounds and each get one be cause they were 8 feet away and deaf.
Mosin-Nagant: You go with 3 other people get the first shot at the first P-dog you see and wipe out the entire colony, leaving a crater that the people who find it claim was a meteor impact.
Regarding muzzle blast:
AR15: Makes a popping sound that is hardly noticed at a public range.
AK47: Makes a hearty boom that usually gets noticed at a public range.
Mosin-Nagant: Makes the Earth tremble and two guys in Bavaria look at each other and ask “vat da hell vas dat?!”
AR15: Looks like a toy
AK47: Looks cobbled together from spare parts
Mosin-Nagant: Looks like a Kentucky Musket of DOOM!
AR15: Sworn at by three generations of American soldiers and Marines
AK47: Brought back as a proof of kill by Carlos Hathcock
Mosin-Nagant: Carried by Samo Hayho, Vasili Ziatsev and feared on both sides of the battle line in the hands of snipers.
AR15: Flash suppressed, super stealthy
AK47: Why worry about stealth when you and your comrades can pour a wall of lead onto the enemy?
Mosin-Nagant: Blinds anybody within 150 meters who’s not wearing welding goggles.
AR15: Can use the bayonet to whittle
AK47: Can use the bayonet to kill an enemy or butcher food
Mosin-Nagant: Bayonet used to cut the sheet metal parts they use to make AR’s and AK’s
AR15: Underslung grenade launcher can take out a dug-in enemy at 300 meters
AK47: Underslung grenade launcher makes a lot of noise and a huge dirt crater
Mosin-Nagant: Who needs grenades when your bullets are so big they can kill tanks?
AR15: Inspired by science fiction
AK47: Inspired by a need for a reliable, selectable-fire weapon
Mosin-Nagant: Inspired by men with balls. Men with HUGE, HAIRY BALLS
AR15: Comprised of several hundred moving parts, usually falls victim to Murphy’s law
AK47: Comprised of as few moving parts as possible, almost impossible to break unless something goes REALLY REALLY WRONG (which might IMPROVE the accuracy)
Mosin-Nagant: Has only one moving part, is held together by only two screws, and damned well outshoots both of the above.
AR15: Rust is your mortal enemy, you clean your gun five times a day.
AK47: Rust might become a problem in a few years, you clean your gun once a month.
Mosin-Nagant: Rust makes your rifle look more authentic.
AR15: You clean your rifle with molecularly engineered precision $1000-ounce synthetic lubricant
AK47: WD-40 is acceptable
Mosin-Nagant: If everything else runs out you can clean your rifle with your own ****
With regard to sound volume:
AR15: Suitable for use with a sound suppressor because its tiny bullet is already quiet.
AK47: No need for a sound suppressor because the enemy will be flat on the ground with their hands over their ears, hiding from the sheer volume of fire.
Mosin-Nagant: You don’t need a sound suppressor, because after the first shot the enemy will be totally deaf anyway.
How long does it take to learn to care for your rifle?
AR15: It will take a drill sergeant about a week to teach you what you need to know about how to disassemble, reassemble and maintain your rifle.
AK47: A good gunnery sergeant can teach you how to care for one in about 4 hours.
Mosin-Nagant: You can learn how to take it apart and put it back together in about 15 minutes with the manual and a couple of YouTube videos in front of you.
AR15: Must be carefully cleaned every 100 rounds or so.
AK47: Only have to worry about cleaning if using Wolf ammo
Mosin-Nagant: Cleaning? Consists of getting liquored up on vodka and peeing down the barrel to get rid of corrosive salts from milsurp primers.
AR15: Opened by pushing 2 pins
AK47: Opened with a swift kick
Mosin-Nagant: Opened with a 2X4 and a ball peen hammer
AR15: Mostly made out of expensive polymers
AK47: Mostly made out of cheap stamped metal and particle board
Mosin-Nagant: Mostly made out of “whatever the f*ck the comrades could find lying around the People’s Factory”
AR15: can probably put together a nice one, due to the popularity of ownership, for under $1,000
AK47: Can probably get a decent one, or refurbished one, for under $500.
Mosin-Nagant: Can probably buy rifle, 440 rounds of ammo, and a case of Windex for under $200.
AR15: Won’t work unless you clean it every day
AK47: Should be cleaned at least once a year
Mosin-Nagant: Was last cleaned by a Russian conscript in Berlin in 1945
AR15: If the firing pin breaks you send it to the factory for repairs
AK47: If the firing pin breaks you buy a new one
Mosin-Nagant: If the firing pin breaks you just screw it deeper into the bolt
AR15: Your accessories cost more than the rifle
AK47: All your accessories cost around $300
Mosin-Nagant: All your accessories come free with the rifle
AR15: Accountant’s Rifle
AK47: Factory Worker’s Rifle
Mosin-Nagant: If you can fill out an application, you can probably already afford it
AR15: Tax return will get it
AK47: Tax return will get you 2 plus mags
Mosin-Nagant: Tax Return will get you a case plus enough ammo to last you till doomsday
AR15: Made when jet passenger flight was fairly regular
AK47: Made when knowing how to fly could make you an officer
Mosin-Nagant: Made when hot air balloons were considered the ultimate flight technology
AR15: Buttstock is collapsible, only used to aid in shooting the rifle
AK47: Buttstock is also good for knocking some oppressor’s teeth out
Mosin-Nagant: Buttstock is good for use as a sledgehammer, crutch, club, or boat oar
A very long internet classic:
AR15: You can pick off prairie dogs at 300 meters all day long
AK47: You can pick off a deer pretty easy at 300 meters
Mosin-Nagant: You get out of your truck, see an elk on top of a hill, and realize you really can use iron sights that far.
AR15: You measure your misses by sub MOA measurements
AK47: You miss and, and aim a bit lower this time.
Mosin-Nagant: Even if you miss the shockwave of the bullet will kill the animal.
AR15: You are careful to keep in clean in the field.
AK47: You don’t worry so much about some dirt getting in it.
Mosin-Nagant: It still has gritty grease inside it from when the Finnish army put it into storage.
AR15: Your bayonet will do an alright job of butchering your kill if needed.
AK47: The bayonet doubles as a decent hunting knife.
Mosin-Nagant: Your bayonet can be used to spit roast an entire pig.
AR15: Nice and light for carrying over obstructions.
AK47: Handy package for carrying over obstructions.
Mosin-Nagant: You can pole vault over obstructions.
AR15: Can’t run dry or you get seizure.
AK47: Can run dry, but may cause laquered ammo to stick in chamber.
Mosin-Nagant: Just handling the bolt gives it enough oil to operate smoothly.
Lots more after the break!
What your wife does after she finds out you spent the tax refund / stimulus payment on a -
AR15: She yells at you for spending the whole thing on a plastic varmint rifle.
AK47: She is disappointed at what an ugly rifle you spent half of it on.
Mosin-Nagant: She doesn’t even notice the Mosin-Nagant because of the diamond ring you got her with all the left over cash.
AR15: Melts IN the fire
AK47: Starts ON fire
Mosin-Nagant: Starts THE fire
AR15: With a custom barrel, Varmint Scope, and gunsmith trigger job, you can vaporize prairie dogs at 600 yards.
AK47: With a good rain, you can wait hidden in the mud at the side of a watering hole and wait for the game to come to you for a shot within 10 yards.
Mosin-Nagant: With a solid shooting position, you can hit that deer on the other side of the valley… and recover the bullet in the tree it was standing in front of.
AR15: You can buy 100 round magazines that require dry-carbon lubricant.
AK47: You can do push-ups on your 30 round steel mag (Saw this in a SPETSNATZ documentary).
Mosin-Nagant: You can use the buttstock to pound in a tent stake and if you don’t have tent stakes, the bayonet will work as one.
AR-15: Carried by elite special forces and highly-trained American soldiers
AK-47: Carried by illiterate peons and unwilling conscripts.
Mosin-Nagant-Nagant: Carried by Vassily Zaitsev.
AR15: Might just stop that charging terrorist with a three round burst
AK47: Would stop the terrorist in his tracks
Mosin-Nagant: Would stop the charging terrorist, his three buddies, and blow up the IED in the next block from the shockwave of the bullet…
AR15: Shoots a .22.
AK47: Shoots a carbine round.
Mosin-Nagant: Shoots a cannonball.
AR15: Shot by the free world
AK47: Shot at the free world
Mosin-Nagant: Almost free to shoot
AR15: Shoot it in the air it goes a mile
AK47: Shoot it in the air it goes 1/2 a mile
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot it in the air and someone in Berlin gets hit by a bullet.
AR15: Made out of used cars and recycled milk jugs
AK47: Made out of oil rigs and packing crates
Mosin-Nagant: Made out of old water pipe and goat carts
AR15: Sounds like a pop gun
AK47: Sounds like a machine gun
Mosin-Nagant: Sounds like the Trinity Atomic Blast
AR15: Sometimes mistaken for a toy
AK47: Sometimes mistaken for random parts
Mosin-Nagant: Sometimes mistaken for an artillery piece, or an anti-aircraft gun
AR15: Pray (it works) and spray
AK47: Spray and pray(you hit something)
Mosin-Nagant: The hammer of God
AR15: Makes grown men laugh.
AK47: Makes grown men cry.
Mosin-Nagant: Makes grown men incontinent.
AR15: Finicky when dirty.
AK47: Still works when dirty.
Mosin-Nagant: Arrives Dirty from the Distributor.
AR15: Don’t run over it…it will Break
AK47: Run over it, it still shoots.
Mosin-Nagant: Run over it and it will flatten your Tires!
AR15: Makes a Pop when fired
AK47: Makes a Boom when fired
Mosin-Nagant: What the hell was that ???
AR15: Ok, I got One!
AK47: Ok, I have 3 different ones.
Mosin-Nagant: Ok, I have Mosin-itis and have 14 and looking for More….
AR15: Makes a small hole in a tree
AK47: Makes a medium sized hole in a tree
Mosin-Nagant: Blows tree in half making firewood available.
AR15: Kills rabbits and coyotes
AK47: Kills pigs and small deer
Mosin-Nagant: If you can’t kill it with a Mosin-Nagant, it can’t be killed
AR15: Safe to stow in poly bags
AK47: Safe to stow in a rice paddy
Mosin-Nagant: Safe to stow in a landfill
AR15: 100 round beta c drum mags you can load with a speed loader
AK47: 75 round drum magazine you have to reload individually by pressing a lever
Mosin-Nagant: You can store 20 of them in a drum with about 1000 rounds on stripper clips
AR15: Has a nice Airsoft copy
AK47: Has a nice Airsoft copy
Mosin-Nagant: Who needs Airsoft when you can fire blanks.
AR15: Makes a nice paperweight
AK47: Makes a nice doorstop
Mosin-Nagant: Makes a nice baseball bat and way cheaper then aluminum
AR15: Loyal following of people that have more money than sense.
AK47: Loyal following of people that have a longer police record than the range of the rifle.
Mosin-Nagant: Loyal following of people that have more rounds of ammo than they got hairs on all family members’ heads combined.
AR-15: Your enemies will giggle
AK-47: Your enemies will take cover and swear as they ready their weapons
Mosin-Nagant: Your enemies will flatten themselves to the ground and offer up prayers of salvation to whatever god they believe in…then they will die.
AR-15: Drop it from ten feet and it shatters.
AK-47: Drop it from ten feet and it still works.
Mosin-Nagant: Drop it from ten feet and it’s more lethal than a lawn dart.
AR-15: You can melt it with a magnifying glass.
AK-47: Under a magnifying glass, you can see the ingrained dirt.
Mosin-Nagant: Under a magnifying glass, you can see the soaked-in BLOOD.
AR-15: Safe, Semiautomatic, Full-Auto (more like full-JAM)
AK-47: Safe(dubious), Semiautomatic, Full-Auto
Mosin-Nagant: Kill, Maim, Destroy
AR-15: When you run out of ammo, duck for cover and spend 15 minutes cleaning and reloading
AK-47: You could probably rig it up to fire chain-linked ammo
Mosin-Nagant: When you run out of ammo (never) you can shoot chaff and langrage from it (wikipedia that)
AR-15: My daddy bought me this weapon for my birthday
AK-47: I saved two weeks’ paychecks to buy this.
Mosin-Nagant: I think it was free…
AR-15: My rifle floated away in the flood
AK-47: My rifle was submerged for three weeks by the flood and still works
Mosin-Nagant: I fired my rifle and the flood waters parted…
AR15: You keep your bayonet in the kitchen because it is a good steak knife
AK47: You keep your bayonet in your toolbox because it is a good wire cutter
Mosin-Nagant: You no longer fix your bayonet in the house because the last time you did you poked a hole in the ceiling when you stood up
AR15: For $1000 you can get one
AK47: For $1000 you can get two and 300 rounds of ammo
Mosin-Nagant: For $1000 you can get 16 of them plus a Bulgarian armory’s worth of surplus ammo
AR15: Can start brush fires with incendiary ammunition.
AK47: Can start brush fires by dropping it after the handguard catches fire.
Mosin-Nagant: Can start brush fires by firing from anything lower than a kneeling position.
AR15: Built with custom parts, nice trigger, all the bells and whistles $1500+
AK47: Modified with aftermarket and 1,000 rounds of ammo not even $1500
Mosin-Nagant: Stock, with 1,000 rounds maybe $300, meaning you get $1200 to spend on more beer
AR15: Takes a few men out in a sweeper movement
AK47: Takes most men out in a sweeper movement
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot one the sonic boom will handle the rest
AR15: Used in negotiations
AK47: Reason for negotiations
Mosin-Nagant: Negotiator
AR15: I think I felt it kick
AK47: Kinda like a 20 guage
Mosin-Nagant: Dislocation
Mosin-Nagant with heavy ball: Where’s my freaking shoulder
AR15: Takes 3 rounds to take out your enemy
AK47: takes 30 rounds sprayed and hopefully you hit your target
Mosin-Nagant: 1 shot, 50 kills
AR15: More options than a custom Rolls-Royce. No two guns are alike.
AK47: Same number of options as a Toyota Corolla. Most guns look alike.
Mosin-Nagant: Options: You want a bayonet with that?
The limits of customizing a-
AR15: How much $ you got.
AK47: What you can find in the Tapco catalog.
Mosin-Nagant: How much duct tape Bubba’s got.
AR15: Such light recoil, you could put on over your balls and fire.
AK47: Recoil manageable enough for anyone to use it.
Mosin-Nagant: Recoil that registers as small tremors in the earth itself.
AR15: Bullet starts tumbling the moment it meets sufficient resistance, like paper
AK47: Bullet will continue trajectory until it hits something solid, like a deer
Mosin-Nagant: It keeps going and going and going….
AR15: You probably drive a Lexus
AK47: If you’re lucky to possess a vehicle, it’s referred to as a “Technical”
Mosin-Nagant: You hang truck-balls off your trailer hitch, and you’re proud of them.
AR15: Lots of fancy optics available
AK47: You can bolt some stuff to the side
Mosin-Nagant: Who cares about optics when the barrel is long enough to smack the enemy over the head without even leaving your foxhole.
AR15: Used by special forces to kill terrorists
AK47: Used by revolutionaries and any two bit nation’s illiterate conscripts to kill each other
Mosin-Nagant: Used by Simo Häyhä to kill Russian conscripts
AR15: Requires over 1000 rounds to break in
AK47: May need some breaking in
Mosin-Nagant: The stripper clips require more breaking in
AR15: Can take down smaller sized game.
AK47: Can take down average sized game.
Mosin-Nagant: Can take down satellites.
AR15: Invented 50 years ago by a consummate engineer
AK47: Invented 60 years ago by wounded tank sergeant
Mosin-Nagant: Invented 117 years ago by two drunks on a budget.
AR15: Star wars
AK47: Holy wars
Mosin-Nagant: Class wars
AR15: Makes small holes
AK47: Makes big holes
Mosin-Nagant: Makes black holes
AR15: Nice lightweight ammo can be carried in quantity.
AK47: You can carry a chest pouch with lots of mags with no problem.
Mosin-Nagant: Ammo is also used in tanks, and larger artillery pieces.
Domestic uses of the bayonet:
AR15: You affix it to your rifle and use it as a dibble to plant tulip bulbs in the garden.
AK47: You affix it to your rifle and use it to trim low-hanging tree branches.
Mosin-Nagant: You affix it to your rifle, accidentally stab it into the ceiling and bring down a square foot of plaster, and spend the next week sleeping on the couch because your wife is pissed off at you.
AR15: Comes in Pink Hello Kitty and Barbie
AK47: Comes in Pink Hello Kitty
Mosin-Nagant: What’s pink?
AR15: Iran-Contra was a cover-up
AK47: Afghanistan (1980) was a cover-up
Mosin-Nagant: Chernobyll was a cover-up
You call the thing with the ammo in it a “clip” and…
AR15: Your buddies glare at you and don’t speak to you for a month.
AK47: Your buddies smile at you with their gold teeth and “blast another cap.”
Mosin-Nagant: Your buddies smile at you because it’s one of the few times you all get to call something a “clip”… and be right.
AR15: Clean with fancy lubes and solvents with special tools.
AK47: Clean? In Soviet Russia AK clean you!
Mosin-Nagant: Squirt some Windex down the bore. Ready for another 500 rounds tomorrow!
AR15: You can be an expert with this rifle after basic training
AK47: You can be an expert with this rifle after a seminar at the Holiday Inn on AKs
Mosin-Nagant: You can be an expert with this rifle after spending 30 minutes on the internet reading forums, and watching youtube videos
AR15: Can shoot a squirrel and have a great meal
AK47: Can shoot a squirrel and have some meat left to eat.
Mosin-Nagant: There is a tail left around here somewhere.
AR15: Puts some countries air force to shame
AK47: Used by countries who can’t afford an air force
Mosin-Nagant: Could be used to take down an air force
AR15: Shoot one and you’ll be owning one soon!
AK47: Shoot one and you will buy some high capacity magazines and 1000 rounds of ammo
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot one and you will own 15 and want another!
AR15: Goes pew pew pew
AK47: Goes pow pow pow
Mosin-Nagant: Goes BOOOOOOOM!
AR15: Made by a stoned Eugene
AK47: Made by an injured Kalashnikov
Mosin-Nagant: Made by a drunken Belgian and a crazy Ivan
Owners drink of choice
AR15: Cognac
AK47: Malt liquor
Mosin-Nagant: Brake cleaner
AR15: Makes a tiny hole with no fragmentation or undue extra injury, in accordance with the Geneva Convention
AK47: Makes a big hole and sometimes flings severed body parts around, not in accordance with the Geneva Convention
Mosin-Nagant: One of the reasons the Geneva Convention was written
AR15: Can shoot it off your head and it won’t kill you
AK47: Shoot it off your head and you die
Mosin-Nagant: Shoot if from your shoulder and you need it popped back into place
AR15: Used to kill Enemies of the State.
AK47: Used by Enemies of the State.
Mosin-Nagant: Enemy at the Gates.
AR15: Good for shooting poodles.
AK47: Good for shooting enemies of the state
Mosin-Nagant: Good for shooting light armored vehicles
AR15: Keeps gunsmiths in business
AK47: Keeps drug dealers and terrorists in business
Mosin-Nagant: Keeps Chiropractors in business
AR15: Built like a Toy.
AK47: Built like a Sewing Machine.
Mosin-Nagant: Built like a Tank!
AR15: Too much Plastic.
AK47: Too Much Sheet metal.
Mosin-Nagant: Too much of everything!
AR15: stays in the Vault.
AK47: not allowed in the vault.
Mosin-Nagant: Can be used to Pole Vault!
AR15: In your Heart you think it’s ugly.
AR15: In your Heart you know it’s ugly.
Mosin-Nagant: You’re afraid to call it ugly!
AR15: It doesn’t go anywhere near <shudder> water… Unless you’re drinking Evian
AK47: If water touches it, it would mistake it for a cleaning solvent and fall apart
Mosin-Nagant: Row-row-row your boat, gently down the Volga…
AR15: If it gets in the Mekong river, you need to clean it before firing.
AK47: If it gets in the Mekong river, shake the water out before firing.
Mosin-Nagant: Used as an oar to paddle up and down the Mekong river
AR15: Used to attack soldiers building a bridge across the Mekong
AK47: Used to protect soldiers building a bridge across the Mekong
Mosin-Nagant: Used to actually build the bridge across the Mekong.
AR15: Plastics make it possible
AK47: Sheet metal make it possible
Mosin-Nagant: Driftwood make it possible
AR15: Nice useful little round.
AK47: Very functional round.
Mosin-Nagant: Anti Tank Round
AR15: Useful against unarmored foe
AK47: Useful against armored foe
Mosin-Nagant: Useful against foe on the other side of the battlefield!
AR15: Useful for hosing down forward edge of the battle area…
AK47: Useful for hosing down sky over forward edge of the battle area…
Mosin-Nagant: Useful for hosing down rear of the battle area, enemy reserves and basic training camps at home…
AR15: Thousands of moving parts, held together by hundreds of bolts, screws, and precision welds.
AK47: Several dozen moving parts, held together by a few screws and some drunken Ivan’s light-sabering with an acetylene torch.
Mosin-Nagant: TWO MOVING PARTS. TWO SCREWS. .
AR15: Owner votes for John McCain
AK47: Owner prays for Barack Hussein Osama
Mosin-Nagant: Owner can overthrow the government no matter who becomes president.
AR15: One tenth the firepower at 10 times the price
AK47: Half the Firepower at twice the price
Mosin-Nagant: 10 times the firepower at one tenth the price
AR15: Turns little rocks into pebbles
AK47: Turns big rocks into little rocks
Mosin-Nagant: Makes molehills out of mountains
AR15: One inch groups at 100 yards.
AK47: Five to six inch groups at 100 yards.
Mosin-Nagant: Muzzle is one inch from target at 100 yards.
AR15: Designs drawn on blueprint paper by stoner and a team of experts in a R&D facility
AK47: Designs drawn on notebook paper by Kalashnikov in a Soviet hospital
Mosin-Nagant: Designs drawn on cocktail napkins by a drunken Sergei Mosin-Nagant in a bar
AR15: Clean with a bunch of cloths, patches, picks, brushes and don’t loose the small parts. Clean every 100 rounds.
AK47: Run a patch down the barrel, wipe out the chamber every few months.
Mosin-Nagant: Throw it in the dishwasher every couple years.
AR15: New shooters love it because of good ergonomics and light recoil.
AK47: New shooters love it because of light recoil.
Mosin-Nagant: New shooters required to sign a waiver-absolving owner of physical damage incurred from recoil
AR15: Usually equipped with flash hider to reduce muzzle flash.
AK47: Can be equipped with flash hider to reduce muzzle flash.
Mosin-Nagant: Muzzle flash can be used to summon the mother ship.
AR15: Can be used to defend home against crooks
AK47: Can be used to defend Oil Tanker against Pirates
Mosin-Nagant: Can Replace one of the Deck Guns on the Kirov Class Battle cruiser
AR-15: Defenders
AK-47: Invaders
Mosin-Nagant: Victors
AR15: High cost, high maintenance.
AK47: Low cost, low maintenance.
Mosin-Nagant: What are these cost and maintenance things you speak of?
AR15: Your rifle takes a few hours to sight in, starting at 50 yard and moving up to 200, making minute adjustments with a small screwdriver.
AK47: You slide your rear sight around until you hit the target.
Mosin-Nagant: You hit your rifle with a hammer to sight it.
AR15: Arm of the free world
AK47: Arm of everybody else
Mosin-Nagant: Arm of Chuck Norris
AR15: Politicians fear it.
AK47: Media fears it.
Mosin-Nagant: Zombies fear it!
At an indoor range.
AR15: Gets people’s attention because of it’s wonderful accuracy.
AK47: Gets people’s attention because of it’s rugged reliability.
Mosin-Nagant: Gets people’s attention because muzzle flash sets off sprinkler system!
As for accurizing.
AR15: You buy match grade components installed by professional gunsmith and spend thousands of dollars.
AK47: You buy GOOD ammo and optics and spend hundreds of dollars.
Mosin-Nagant: You use an empty soda can, some sand paper and spend seven bucks!
AR15: You can put one hole in a paper target at 100 meters with 30 rounds.
AK47: You can put a .30″ hole through 12″ of oak, if you can hit it.
Mosin-Nagant: You can knock down everyone else’s target with the shock wave of your bullet going downrange.
AR15: When out of ammo, your rifle makes a great whiffle bat.
AK47: When out of ammo your rifle will nominally pass as a club.
Mosin-Nagant: When out of ammo, your rifle makes a supreme war club, pike, boat oar, tent pole, or firewood.
AR15: What’s recoil?
AK47: Recoil is manageable, even fun.
Mosin-Nagant: Recoil is often used to relocate shoulders thrown out by the previous shot.
AR15: Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of minute of angle.
AK47: Your sight adjustment goes to “10″, and you’ve never bothered moving it.
Mosin-Nagant: Your sight adjustment goes to 12 miles and you’ve actually tried it.
AR15: After a day at the range, you detail strip your rifle and thoroughly clean and lubricate it with only the best products.
AK47: After a day of shooting out back you run a quick patch through the bore and throw your rifle in the back of your truck.
Mosin-Nagant: Cleaning….and maintenance?
AR15: Millennium Falcon
AK47: Star Destroyer
Mosin-Nagant: The Death Star
As for accessories.
AR15: You have a never ending list of high dollar tacticool accessories.
AK47: You have a never ending list of Chinese made tacticool accessories.
Mosin-Nagant: You have carry strap and ammo what more you need comrade?
AR15: Cost a lot of money
AK47: Cost some money
Mosin-Nagant: free with purchase of bayonet
AR15: Backordered.
AK47: Backordered.
Mosin-Nagant: Mail ordered.
AR15: When out of ammo you would rather die than risk damaging your $1200 rifle buy using it as a club.
AK47: When out of ammo your rifle makes a nice club.
Mosin-Nagant: Your rifle is a club that can shoot people.
AR15: When on patrol in Vietnam ammo is so light you can carry around 900 rounds of ammo with you.
AK47: When patrolling your warlord’s territory, you carry all the ammo you need in the back of a technical.
Mosin-Nagant: When sent to battle at Stalingrad you are only issued a stripper clip of ammunition and told that you would find your rifle laying on the ground.
AR15: Got it by joining army
AK47: Got it with one paycheck
Mosin-Nagant: Got it by saving beer cans
On prairie dogs:
AR15: You sit back with your buddies poopin them all day long 651hits 3 misses.
AK47: You and another person go to a dog-town fire 4,000 rounds and each get one be cause they were 8 feet away and deaf.
Mosin-Nagant: You go with 3 other people get the first shot at the first P-dog you see and wipe out the entire colony, leaving a crater that the people who find it claim was a meteor impact.
Regarding muzzle blast:
AR15: Makes a popping sound that is hardly noticed at a public range.
AK47: Makes a hearty boom that usually gets noticed at a public range.
Mosin-Nagant: Makes the Earth tremble and two guys in Bavaria look at each other and ask “vat da hell vas dat?!”
AR15: Looks like a toy
AK47: Looks cobbled together from spare parts
Mosin-Nagant: Looks like a Kentucky Musket of DOOM!
AR15: Sworn at by three generations of American soldiers and Marines
AK47: Brought back as a proof of kill by Carlos Hathcock
Mosin-Nagant: Carried by Samo Hayho, Vasili Ziatsev and feared on both sides of the battle line in the hands of snipers.
AR15: Flash suppressed, super stealthy
AK47: Why worry about stealth when you and your comrades can pour a wall of lead onto the enemy?
Mosin-Nagant: Blinds anybody within 150 meters who’s not wearing welding goggles.
AR15: Can use the bayonet to whittle
AK47: Can use the bayonet to kill an enemy or butcher food
Mosin-Nagant: Bayonet used to cut the sheet metal parts they use to make AR’s and AK’s
AR15: Underslung grenade launcher can take out a dug-in enemy at 300 meters
AK47: Underslung grenade launcher makes a lot of noise and a huge dirt crater
Mosin-Nagant: Who needs grenades when your bullets are so big they can kill tanks?
AR15: Inspired by science fiction
AK47: Inspired by a need for a reliable, selectable-fire weapon
Mosin-Nagant: Inspired by men with balls. Men with HUGE, HAIRY BALLS
AR15: Comprised of several hundred moving parts, usually falls victim to Murphy’s law
AK47: Comprised of as few moving parts as possible, almost impossible to break unless something goes REALLY REALLY WRONG (which might IMPROVE the accuracy)
Mosin-Nagant: Has only one moving part, is held together by only two screws, and damned well outshoots both of the above.
AR15: Rust is your mortal enemy, you clean your gun five times a day.
AK47: Rust might become a problem in a few years, you clean your gun once a month.
Mosin-Nagant: Rust makes your rifle look more authentic.
AR15: You clean your rifle with molecularly engineered precision $1000-ounce synthetic lubricant
AK47: WD-40 is acceptable
Mosin-Nagant: If everything else runs out you can clean your rifle with your own ****
With regard to sound volume:
AR15: Suitable for use with a sound suppressor because its tiny bullet is already quiet.
AK47: No need for a sound suppressor because the enemy will be flat on the ground with their hands over their ears, hiding from the sheer volume of fire.
Mosin-Nagant: You don’t need a sound suppressor, because after the first shot the enemy will be totally deaf anyway.
How long does it take to learn to care for your rifle?
AR15: It will take a drill sergeant about a week to teach you what you need to know about how to disassemble, reassemble and maintain your rifle.
AK47: A good gunnery sergeant can teach you how to care for one in about 4 hours.
Mosin-Nagant: You can learn how to take it apart and put it back together in about 15 minutes with the manual and a couple of YouTube videos in front of you.
AR15: Must be carefully cleaned every 100 rounds or so.
AK47: Only have to worry about cleaning if using Wolf ammo
Mosin-Nagant: Cleaning? Consists of getting liquored up on vodka and peeing down the barrel to get rid of corrosive salts from milsurp primers.
AR15: Opened by pushing 2 pins
AK47: Opened with a swift kick
Mosin-Nagant: Opened with a 2X4 and a ball peen hammer
AR15: Mostly made out of expensive polymers
AK47: Mostly made out of cheap stamped metal and particle board
Mosin-Nagant: Mostly made out of “whatever the f*ck the comrades could find lying around the People’s Factory”
AR15: can probably put together a nice one, due to the popularity of ownership, for under $1,000
AK47: Can probably get a decent one, or refurbished one, for under $500.
Mosin-Nagant: Can probably buy rifle, 440 rounds of ammo, and a case of Windex for under $200.
AR15: Won’t work unless you clean it every day
AK47: Should be cleaned at least once a year
Mosin-Nagant: Was last cleaned by a Russian conscript in Berlin in 1945
AR15: If the firing pin breaks you send it to the factory for repairs
AK47: If the firing pin breaks you buy a new one
Mosin-Nagant: If the firing pin breaks you just screw it deeper into the bolt
AR15: Your accessories cost more than the rifle
AK47: All your accessories cost around $300
Mosin-Nagant: All your accessories come free with the rifle
AR15: Accountant’s Rifle
AK47: Factory Worker’s Rifle
Mosin-Nagant: If you can fill out an application, you can probably already afford it
AR15: Tax return will get it
AK47: Tax return will get you 2 plus mags
Mosin-Nagant: Tax Return will get you a case plus enough ammo to last you till doomsday
AR15: Made when jet passenger flight was fairly regular
AK47: Made when knowing how to fly could make you an officer
Mosin-Nagant: Made when hot air balloons were considered the ultimate flight technology
AR15: Buttstock is collapsible, only used to aid in shooting the rifle
AK47: Buttstock is also good for knocking some oppressor’s teeth out
Mosin-Nagant: Buttstock is good for use as a sledgehammer, crutch, club, or boat oar
